A letter to my future self:
Do you remember that feeling? When you held that pregnancy test in your hands? For five long minutes you felt utterly afraid that you might be informed that you hold human life inside of you. You and your husband were not ready for this. And yet, when you read the negative result you sobbed. You sobbed because you were worried. What if you were unable to have children? What if you could never be exhausted at night because your newborn was crying? What if you never had sippy cups lying around the house or stretch marks? No nurseries, no strollers, no bath time. What if you had to hold back tears every time you pass baby clothes in Target?
You were worried.
I’m writing to you so you remember. I do not know whether you will ever have stretch marks or not. I pray you do. I pray every night that you do.
But if you don’t, I pray that you remember who your God is. He is the God of Hannah and Sarah who had broken hearts because they could not have stretch marks for a while. He is the God that we put all our hope in. He is the God that has a beautiful plan that we cannot even comprehend! He is for us. He is the God that cries with us in our pain and affliction. He is with us.
I’m writing to you so you remember. If you do get those stretch marks, remember those around you who cannot. Remember that they share in those tears that you once cried. Hug them. Cry with them. Pray with them. Remember the orphans who are praying for a mother like you. You can be a mother with or without stretch marks.
I ultimately hope that your heart is where the real stretch marks are. I pray your heart is filled to the brim with trust and contentment in The Lord. I pray He stretches and molds you. I pray that you remember that you are HIS child and He loves you. He is good and He loves you.
2 Corinthians 4:16-18
So we do not lose heart. Though our outer self is wasting away, our inner self is being renewed day by day. For this light momentary affliction is preparing for us an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison, as we look not to the things that are seen but to the things that are unseen. For the things that are seen are transient, but the things that are unseen are eternal.